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Sex Explained

Created: 13 October 2015
Hits: 2647

Basically there are 5 kinds of sex:

Smurf Sex - On your honeymoon you keep doing it until you're both blue in the face.

Kitchen Sex - At the beginning of your marriage you'll have sex anytime, anywhere - even in the kitchen.

Bedroom Sex - When you've settled down a bit, maybe have some kids, so you gotta restrict it to the bedroom.

Hallway Sex - You reach the point where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Fuck you!"

Courtroom Sex - Finally, you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of the whole courtroom.

Sometimes You Need A Break In The Action

Created: 11 October 2015
Hits: 2387

Two Syrian hookers were talking about their problems. One said: "With the Russians jumping into this war we've got soldiers lined up around the block. I need a break!"

Her girlfriend agreed: "Yeah... I think we need to declare a no fly zone."

Advice For Newlyweds

Created: 10 October 2015
Hits: 2311

Keep this in mind... a honeymoon should only be for six days. Why? Because seven days make a whole week.

In fact, don't go on your honeymoon for longer than 5 days, or you will get a weak end.

Just sayin'...

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

And Now I'm Outta Here

Why did the woman leave her husband after he spent all their money on a penis enlarger?

She just couldn’t take it any longer.

Passing The Time

Why aren't federal government employees allowed to look out the window in the morning?

Because then they would have nothing to do in the afternoon.

Sound Advice For Nature Lovers

What do a grizzly bear and a limp dick have in common?

Don't fuck with them.

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