Eyeglass Problem Solved

What should you do if your sister-in-law sits on your glasses & breaks them?

Take them off next time.

How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?

Marry her.

What did one tampon say to the other?

Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.

What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?

Seizure Salad.