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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

What Are Friends For

Created: 19 June 2016
Hits: 2962

A woman was in bed screwing her husband's best friend when the phone rang

After hanging up, she says, "That was Harry, but don't worry, he won't be home for a while. He's playing cards with you."

Turn The Beat Around

Created: 17 June 2016
Hits: 2873

A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a red “H” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” he asks. “Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we screw,” she replies.

A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a blue “Y” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” he asks. “Oh, my boyfriend goes to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when he's banging me,” she replies.

A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green “M” on her chest. “Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?” asks the doctor. “No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin. Why do you ask?”

One Professional to Another

Created: 14 June 2016
Hits: 3050

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around and yells: "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

The guy behind him says: "I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."

"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

By Any Other Name

What do you call a guy with a small dick?

Justin!

What do you call a guy with a giant dick?

Phil!

Go Both Ways

Old Dick is ambidextrous. Yep! I can swing a bat from both sides of the plate, & jerk off with both hands.

The One Thing Not To Do

What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from an old woman have in common?

You don't look down.

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