The One Thing Not To Do

What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from an old woman have in common?

You don't look down.

Judge Calloway's court docket was too full.

So he knocked the sodomy charge down to "following too close."

A guy visits a psychiatrist and lies on the couch. The doc asks: "What's your problem?"

The guy tells him, "Doc, I can't seem to make any friends. Can you help me, you fat fuck?"

What is the definition of confidence?

When your wife catches you in bed with another woman and you slap her on the ass and say, "You're next Baby... !"