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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Bring Out The Tape Measure

Created: 18 September 2016
Hits: 3064

Why are dicks like fish?

You throw the small ones back, you keep the medium ones and you mount the big ones.

Let Me Introduce You To

Created: 16 September 2016
Hits: 2944

What did one whore's knee say to the other?

Nothing... they never met.

Not The Best Choice

Created: 12 September 2016
Hits: 2773

Why do men name their dicks?

They don't want ninety-five per cent of their decisions made by a total stranger.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

How Long Can You Go For?

A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their sex lives.

"Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me."

"Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man."

When the American remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?" "Once," he replied. "Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?"

"Don't stop."

Not Necessarily From The Bronx

What's the definition of a Yankee?

Same thing as a quickie only you do it yourself.

It Takes More Than One

After weeks without gettin' any I got really pissed off and asked my wife: "What has two arms, two legs, two boobs & sucks?"

Before she could even think of a reply I told her: "You and a vacuum cleaner."

And that's when the fight started...

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