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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

You're Never Too Old

Created: 26 October 2016
Hits: 2435

Two old ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing. One turns to the other and asks, "Do you still get horny?"

Her friend replies, "Oh sure I do." So the first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?" The second one answers: "I suck a lifesaver."

After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?"

 

Five Will Get You Ten

Created: 24 October 2016
Hits: 2590

What do you say to a man with five penises?

"Your jeans fit like a glove."

Say Hello to Your New Friend

Created: 21 October 2016
Hits: 2482

An old woman wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery to bury her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver, I have a dead pussy. The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and said, "Sit with my wife...you two have a lot in common."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Breaking A Bad Habit

How do you get your wife to stop sucking her thumb?

Draw a dick on it.

I thought girls never fart, or poop!

My wife and I were talking about the differences between little boys and little girls. I asked her: "Why don't little girls fart like little boys do?"

She answered: "Because they don't get assholes until they're married."

And that's when the fight started...

Dig Deep In The Memory Banks

A man picks up a cute little number in a bar and convinces her to come back to his hotel. After they're done screwing around he asks, "Am I the first man you ever made love to?"

She looks at him thoughtfully for a second before replying. "You might be... your face looks familiar."

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