A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

See What I Mean?

Hits: 2733

Why was the nearsighted fly starving?

He couldn't see shit.

That's Her Opinion

Hits: 2848

Honeymoon morning after. Wife: "You're a lousy lover."

Husband: "How can you tell after only 30 seconds?"

Pirate Walks Into A Bar

Hits: 2609

Bartender to pirate: Why the paper towel sticking out of your hat?

Pirate: Arrgh, Got a bounty on me head.

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Salad

What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?

Seizure Salad.

Also Known As A Bigshot

My dick is so big, it won't return Spielberg's calls.

Cure For Constipation

A nun walks into a liquor store and says, "Give me a pint of brandy." The guy says, "Sister, I've never sold alcohol to a nun." She says, "It's for the Mother Superior, she's constipated."

So he sells it to her. Later that night, he walks out, and there's the nun on the stoop, with the empty bottle, drunk as a skunk, singing and laughing. He says, "Sister, for shame. You told me the bottle was for the Mother Superior's constipation."

The nun says, "It is. She's constipated, and when she sees me, she's gonna shit."