How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?
Marry her.
What does it mean when your wife is lying in bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
My wife was lying in bed a little dissatisfied with my performance when she asked: "What do my clitoris, our anniversary, and the fuckin' toilet have in common?" I said "You got me."
She said: "You miss them all."
And that's when the fight started...
My wife wanted to convince me of the benefits of marriage. So she argued "You know married men live longer than single men."
I shot back: "That's not true, it only seems longer."
And that's when the fight started....
