How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?
Marry her.
My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!" I told him, "No, your generation relies too much on technology!"
Then I unplugged his life support.
My wife was telling me all about this new transgender thing... you know, where guys turn themselves into women. I said to her: "Yeah. Well that ain't nothin' You know how to turn a fox into an elephant?"
She said: "How?" I told her: "Marry it."
And that's when the fight started...
What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common?
As soon as you see it coming you know someone is going to lose a trailer.
