Why can't lesbians adopt a child?
Because they don't serve minors to lickers.
My girlfriend's a real clean freak. She says it's disgusting to piss in the bathtub.
Next time maybe I should wait until she gets out.
Why is a pussy like the weather?
Because once it's wet, you know it's time to go inside.
"Forgive me, Father, I was fucking my wife and fantasized she was a nun."
"My son, sometimes when I fuck a nun I fantasize it's your wife."
