A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

The Down Under

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How's an old lady's twat like Australia?

Everybody knows it's down there but nobody really gives a shit.

Needs More Duct Tape

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What's the best thing about duct tape?

It turns, "No! No!," into "Mmm! Mmm!"

Pizza Has Arrived, Finally

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What's the difference between a musician and a pizza?

A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Pillow Fight

What does it mean when your wife is lying in bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

No Need To Call The Police

It's Valentine's day! So ladies, don't you worry about getting me what you got me last year.

I have enough restraining orders already.

Not Like She Used To Be

A wife arrived home after a shopping trip, and was horrified to find her husband in bed with a cute little hottie.

Just as she was about to storm out of the house in anger, her husband stopped her and begged to explain: "Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about. Driving home, I saw this young girl. She was looking poor and tired, so I offered her a ride. She said she was hungry, so I brought her home and fed her some of the roast you had forgotten about in the fridge. Her shoes were worn out, so I offered her the pair you didn’t wear because you thought they went out of style. She was cold so I gave her that birthday sweater you never wore even once because the color didn’t suit you. Her slacks were worn out so I gave her a pair of yours, the ones you said didn’t fit anymore. Then as this poor young lady was about to leave, she paused at the door and asked me, 'Is there anything else that your wife doesn’t use anymore?'"

"And so, here we are!"