What's the best thing about duct tape?
It turns, "No! No!," into "Mmm! Mmm!"
A chicken and and egg are lying in bed.
The chicken begins to light up a cigarette.
The egg says: "Well... I guess that answers that question."
How can you tell when your girlfriend's getting really fat?
You start asking your wife for sex.
What's the difference between love and herpes?
Love doesn't last forever.