A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Be Careful What You Wish For

Hits: 2784

A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans over, makes a wish, and throws in a penny. His wife decides to make a wish, too, but she leans over too far, falls into the well, and drowns.

The guy says, "Fuck...it works."

Going Down Under And Not Coming Back

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A guy says, "For our Twentieth Anniversary, I'm taking my wife to Australia."

His friend says, "That's going to be tough to beat. What're you going to do for your Twenty-Fifth Anniversary?"

The first guy says, "I'm going to go back and get her."

 

Put Her In Her Place

Hits: 3526

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Wicked Witch

One night I came home a little late and very drunk. There was my wife standing there holding a broom

Thinking fast (maybe too fast) I said: "Are you still cleaning or are you going for a ride?"

And that's when the fight started...

To Know Which Way The Wind Blows

Husband and wife are fast asleep when the phone rings at two o'clock in the morning. The husband picks up the phone and says: "Hello?... How the heck do I know? What am I, the weatherman?" Then he  slams the phone down.

His wife rolls over and asks: "Who was that?" The husband replies: "I don't know. Some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear."

Here Pussy, Pussy, Pussy...

The teacher asked Little Johnny, "Why is your cat at school today Johnny?"

Johnny replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Johnny leaves for school!'"