A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Three for Three

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Three blondes walk into a building.

You'd think one of them would've seen it...

Add That To The List

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A cop pulls a guy over. He tells him: "You've got expired plates, your inspection is overdue, you're not wearing a seatbelt and you've got an open can of beer in your hand!"

The guy says: "I'll see you tomorrow then." The cop shoots back: "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

The guy snaps: "Hang on a minute pal, I'm on the phone here."

Lesson Soon Learned

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Cop pulls a guy over at 3am: "Where you going at this hour?"

Guy says: "To a lecture on alcohol abuse, its effect on the human body. And the dangers of smoking & staying out late."

"Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

"My wife."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

No Joking Around

I thought I would kid my wife a little, so I said: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, it's too long."

She shot back: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."

And that's when the fight started...

Drive Safely

A car was driving recklessly down the street, swerving left and right. When it whizzed past a cop he pulled it over. A blonde rolled down the window and said, " Officer, I'm so glad you're here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting them!"

The officer looked at her and said, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."

Take A Little Off The Top

A priest goes to get his hair cut. When the barber's done, the priest goes to pay him, but the barber says, "No thanks, my friend. I couldn't take money from a man of the cloth." The next day the barber shows up for work and there's a dozen boxes of chocolates waiting for him with a thank you note from the priest.

That afternoon a rabbi comes in and the barber cuts his hair. When he gets done the rabbi goes to pay him, but the barber says, "No thanks, my friend, I couldn't take money from a man of the cloth."

The next day when he shows up for work, there's a dozen rabbis waiting for him.