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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

In The Classroom

Created: 17 October 2016
Hits: 2765

The teacher asked the class: "What's the capital of Wisconsin?"

The blonde raised her hand and answered: "W"

What Are You Wearing?

Created: 15 October 2016
Hits: 3126

I needed hearing aids, so I asked my doc for the latest technology. You know... the ones that connect directly to the 900 chat lines so I can listen "hands-free"... if you know what I mean.

Who's In Charge Here

Created: 13 October 2016
Hits: 2701

The body parts were all arguing about who should be in charge. The heart said: "I pump the blood that keeps us all alive. I should be the boss." The lungs said: "Without us sucking air, we'd all die." And so all the parts... the eyes, the ears, the hands all made their case. Finally the brain said: "I control all of you. That makes me the right choice. I make the decisions... so I'm the boss!"

While the parts were all considering the brain's strong argument, the asshole chimed in: "I'm the most important! I want to be the boss." Whereupon all the body parts laughed in his face.

So the asshole closed up. In a few days the heart pumped slower, it was harder to breathe, the eyes were watering, the hands were weak. Finally all the parts had to agree... the asshole could be in charge.

Which proves that you don't have to have brains to be the boss, you just have to be an asshole.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire

My wife and I were watching "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and said: 'Do you want to have sex?

"'No!" she answered. Then I said: "Is that your final answer?"

She didn't even look at me this time, and just said: "Yes."

So I said: "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started...

Just One Question

So tell me... if a firefighter's business can go up in smoke, and a plumber's business can go down the drain... can a hooker get layed off? Just askin'!

Wipe Nair On, Wipe Hair Off

How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?

A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.

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