The teacher asked the class: "What's the capital of Wisconsin?"
The blonde raised her hand and answered: "W"
Why are a woman's breasts like a Xmas train set?
Originally made for kids but dad wants to play with them.
A bum walks up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and says: "I haven't eaten anything in four days!"
She looks back at him and says: "God I wish I had your will power."
What should you do if your sister-in-law sits on your glasses & breaks them?
Take them off next time.