Just Plain Funny
Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!
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A guy asks his drinkin' buddy if he had any suggestions on how to spice up a dull marriage. His buddy tells him "Well, you can always have an affair."
"I can't possibly do that! I would never cheat on her." he replies. So his buddy tells him "Look, if you convince her to let you do it, it won't be cheating." The guy thinks sure, that could work. And so he heads home, and finding his wife in the perfect mood, he springs the idea on her that maybe a new partner would add some excitement.
"Honey," his wife says, "that won't help our marriage. Believe me, I already tried it."
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A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I need to go fishing with the boss for the weekend. We leave right away, so can you pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and my blue silk pajamas? I'll be home in an hour to pick them up." He hurries home, grabs everything and rushes off.
Sunday night, he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip?" "Oh yes, great! I think I really impressed the boss. But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."
"Oh, no I didn't. I put them in your tackle box."
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A woman visits the doctor, with bumps and bruises all over her body. She complains that it was her husband who beat her.
The doctor is surprised: "I thought your husband was out of town."
"So did I..."