Every Frickin' Joke
Been There Done That
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3546
A guy asks his drinkin' buddy if he had any suggestions on how to spice up a dull marriage. His buddy tells him "Well, you can always have an affair."
"I can't possibly do that! I would never cheat on her." he replies. So his buddy tells him "Look, if you convince her to let you do it, it won't be cheating." The guy thinks sure, that could work. And so he heads home, and finding his wife in the perfect mood, he springs the idea on her that maybe a new partner would add some excitement.
"Honey," his wife says, "that won't help our marriage. Believe me, I already tried it."
A Lesson Learned
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 2895
A guy was talking to his buddy, "I learned a very important life lesson today. I'm getting married in a few weeks and I went over to my fiancee's house to look at the wedding invitations with her mom. Her mother's really sexy, and as we were looking at the invitations, she started rubbing my leg. Within a few minutes she leaned over and asked me if I'd take her upstairs and fuck her. I immediately got up and walked out the front door. On the way out I ran into her father. He smiled and told me 'You passed our little test, son. Glad to have you in the family.'"
"So what's the life lesson?" his friend asked.
"Always keep your rubbers in the glove box."
Who Caught What
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2685
A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I need to go fishing with the boss for the weekend. We leave right away, so can you pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and my blue silk pajamas? I'll be home in an hour to pick them up." He hurries home, grabs everything and rushes off.
Sunday night, he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip?" "Oh yes, great! I think I really impressed the boss. But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."
"Oh, no I didn't. I put them in your tackle box."
How To Get Him In The Mood
- Category: And that's when the fight started...
- Hits: 2937
For their 10th anniversary, a wife surprises her husband by wearing the lingerie she wore on their wedding night. She asks him what his exact thoughts were 10 years ago when he first saw her in the lingerie.
He tells her, "I wanted to suck your tits dry and fuck your brains out." "Well, what do you think today?" she asks,
He says, "Mission accomplished!"
And that's when the fight started...
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