What do you call a guy who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you the flavor?
A smartass!
What is more messed up than fingering your sister?
Pulling your finger out and finding your dad's wedding ring.
Why do blondes like to drive cars with a sunroof?
More leg room.
I saw my wife bought one of those new Wonder Bras.
Goofing around I told her: "You know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When you take it off you wonder where your tits went."
And that's when the fight started...