What do you call a guy who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you the flavor?
A smartass!
My wife told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy.
When I came back she asked what did I get. I told her I got drunk.
And that's when the fight started...
Why can't blondes parallel park? 'Cause guys keep telling them that 4 inches is really 8 inches.
What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?
Seizure Salad.
