Dick's Jokes
A Lot On The Side
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3359
How can you tell when your girlfriend's getting really fat?
You start asking your wife for sex.
Reason To Stay Single
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3083
The laundromat: a bad place to find chicks.
If she can't afford a washing machine how can she support you?
Moaning And Groaning
- Category: And that's when the fight started...
- Hits: 3663
My wife and I were basking in the afterglow of having sex when she asked: "Honey, why did God create orgasms?"
I said: "So women can moan even when they’re happy."
And that's when the fight started...
Makes You Want To Take An Uber
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3282
What is the difference between a New York City taxi and an elephant?
The elephant has the trunk in the front and the asshole in the back.
Hate To Cop An Attitude, But...
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3372
I quit my job at the helium gas factory.
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice.
Big Ben
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 4474
Why were the two whores travelling in London pissed off?
Because they found out that Big Ben was a clock!
Should Have Become A Gynecologist
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3611
What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?
A wet nose.
Two Blondes Checking The Tracks
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3253
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The first blonde said: "These look like deer tracks." The other one said: "No they look like moose tracks."
They argued and argued for a while. They were still arguing when the train hit them.
He Takes The Crown
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3135
Who's the world's greatest athlete?
The guy who finishes first and third in a masturbation contest.
The One Thing Not To Do
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3673
What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from an old woman have in common?
You don't look down.
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