What's the best thing about a blow job?
Ten minutes of silence!
What gets longer when you pull it, fits between the breasts, inserts neatly in a hole, and works best when jerked?
A seat belt.
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.
I told her the beer would make her look way better at night than any jar of cold cream.
And that's when the fight started...
Why were the two whores travelling in London pissed off?
Because they found out that Big Ben was a clock!
