Dick Jokes
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What do you get when you cross a hooker with a piranha?
Your last blow job.
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A son asks his father: "What's the difference between 'potential' and 'reality'."
His father thinks for a moment then says: "Go ask your mother if she'd sleep with George Clooney for a million bucks."
So he does and mom says: "You bet I would!" The boy reports back to his father but still doesn't understand.
So the father says: "Now, go ask your sister if she'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million bucks."
Off he goes to ask his sister and her reply is: "Absolutely!"
Finally the boy goes back to his dad and says: "I think I get it pop. 'Potentially' we are sitting on two million dollars here... but in 'reality' we're living with a couple of whores."
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A guy takes his date back to her place. He gets her up to her bedroom where he sees a wall full of fluffy toys.
After he fucks her he asks her: "How was I?"
She says: "Take anything from the bottom shelf."