Every Frickin' Joke
I've Had Better
- Category: And that's when the fight started...
- Hits: 2927
On our honeymoon night I asked my bride, "Honey... am I the first?"
She replied, "Why does everybody ask that?"
And that's when the fight started...
What Does Your Dad Do
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3349
The teacher says to her new class, "For our first lesson, each of you will stand up, tell us your name, what your father does, spell what your father does, and then explain it to us. All right, Billy."
Billy stands up and says, "My name's Billy. My father's a lawyer, l-a-w-y-e-r, and he defends people in court."
The teacher says, "Very good. All right, Tyrone."
Tyrone stands up and says, "My name's Tyrone. My father's a pharmacist, f-a-m...f-a-r-n...f-n..."
The teacher says, "Tyrone, you go home tonight and learn how to spell pharmacist. All right, Angelo."
Angelo stands up and says, "My name's Angelo. My old man's a bookie, b-o-o-k-i-e, and if he was here, he'd give you nine-to-five Tyrone ain't spellin' pharmacist by tomorrow."
Like A Bird
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3687
One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.
"Your Honor," she began coolly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly."
Rather Have A Puppy
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3598
Little Johnny is walking along with his father and they pass two dogs that are going at it. He says, "Hey, Pop! What's happenin' over there?"
His father says, "Er... son, they're making a puppy."
That night, Little Johnny walks past his parents bedroom, and the old man's giving it to the old lady. Little Johnny says, "Hey, Pop! What's happenin' now?"
His father says, "Er...son, we're making you a baby brother."
Little Johnny says, "Well, flip her over. I'd rather have a puppy."
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