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: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 10 March 2016; Hits: 3919

What's the difference between a husand and a wife?

Wives want to videotape the birth of their child. Husbands want to videotape the conception.

Do I Make You Hungry Baby?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 09 March 2016; Hits: 2950

What’s the difference between being hungry and horny?

Where you put the cucumber.

Just The Tip?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 08 March 2016; Hits: 3978

As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife. She turns over and says, "I'm sorry, honey. I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over.

A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"

Where Not To Save Money

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 07 March 2016; Hits: 2840

What do you call a cheap circumcision?

A rip-off!

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May I Ask Who's Calling

A man calls the doctor and is frantic, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"

"Is this her first child?" the doctor asks.

"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"

There's a Secret To It

A guy really wants to fuck his wife in the ass. But no matter what he tries she always says no. So he goes to a sex therapist for some advice. The therapist says, "There's one sure-fire solution to your problem. There's a very special herb that only grows in the Amazon. It's very hard to find, but if you go there and find it, it'll be well worth it, because it'll solve your problem."

So for ten years the guy visits the Amazon. Each year the journey is fraught with danger, including being caught by cannibals and almost dying of malaria. Finally, after years of searching, he finds the herb and brings it back to the doctor. The doc tells him: "Leave it with me, and I'll prepare it. Come back tomorrow."

The next day when he returns the doctor hands him a little bottle filled with a mysterious green liquid. The guys asks: "Okay, how do I use it, Doc?"

The doctor says, "It's easy. You put the bottle on your wife's night stand. Then you say, 'Honey, would you grab that little bottle for me?' And when she turns around and bends over to grab it, boom!, you fuck her in the ass."

I've Had Better

On our honeymoon night I asked my bride, "Honey... am I the first?"

She replied, "Why does everybody ask that?"

And that's when the fight started...