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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

What An UGLY Baby!

Created: 19 February 2015
Hits: 3649

What sexual position should a woman use to make an ugly kid?

Ask your Mom.

The Father, The Son, And ? ....

Created: 18 February 2015
Hits: 2701

Little Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way.
Johnny says, "Hey, mister, why are you wearin' your collar backwards?"
The priest says, "Because I'm a father."
Johnny says, "Yeah? Well, my old man's got three kids and he don't wear his collar backwards."
The priest says, "You don't understand, son. I have thousands of children."
Johnny says, "You should wear your fuckin' trousers backwards!"

A Visit To My Local Sex Toys Shop

Created: 15 February 2015
Hits: 2996

This year I bought some interesting gifts for my wife for Valentine's Day

I got her 2 sets of handcuffs, 4 pairs of crotchless panties, a giant butt plug, a 12 inch vibrator, a bondage whip, a naughty nurses outfit and 6 huge glow in the dark penis shaped helium balloons.

Will she be happy with it all? I don't know.

But what I do know is that on February 14th her grave will stand out more than any others in the cemetery!

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Go For The Gold!

I told my wife, "Honey, I bought some Olympic condoms today. I think I'll wear Gold tonight."

She replied, "Why not wear Silver and not finish first for a change?"

And that's when the fight started...

Can You Give A Date To This?

How do you confuse a female archaeologist?

Give her a used tampon and ask her what period it's from.

Going Downtown

When do you know you've been married too long?

The only reason you go down on it is because it doesn't talk back.

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