Dick Jokes

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The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?

Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

What does a woman's asshole do when she has an orgasm?

He's probably home watching football or something.

Little Johnny was in sex ed class when the teacher began a discussion about genitals. Johnny shouted out, "My old man has got two of those"

The teacher was shocked and asked Johnny to explain.

"Well, the small one he uses when he takes a piss. And the large one he uses to brush the baby sitter's teeth."

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I thought I would kid my wife a little, so I said: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, it's too long."

She shot back: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."

And that's when the fight started...

I asked my wife what she'd do if I won the lottery. She told me she'd take half and leave me.

So I told her: "Great! I won 10 bucks on a scratch-off this morning. Here's your five, now get the fuck out."

And that's when the fight started...

Why does a bride smile as she walks down the aisle?

Because she knows she's given her last blowjob.

Too Soon