A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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And that's when the fight started...

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I'm just sayin... that's all.

Rub-A-Dub-Dub

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The other night I was having sex with my wife when my cell phone rang. I answered it and said: "Can I call you back? I'm in the tub."

And that's when the fight started...

Always Right

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My wife was fishing for a compliment. So she asked me: "So, do you think you married Miss Right."

I said: "Yeah, I just didn't know your first name was 'Always.'"

And that's when the fight started...

I've Had Better

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On our honeymoon night I asked my bride, "Honey... am I the first?"

She replied, "Why does everybody ask that?"

And that's when the fight started...

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What's That In Your Pants

My wife thought she would come on real sexy to distract me from the game. So she asked: "Honey, What do you have in your pants that's gonna wind up in my face?"

I looked up and said: "Wrinkles."

And that's when the fight started...

Count On This Happening

Little Johnny came home and told his mom he got kicked out of mathematics class. His mom asked "What happened."

Little Johnny told her: "The teacher asked me, 'What comes after 69?' Apparently 'mouthwash' was the wrong answer!"

Where Is The Nearest ATM?

A plumber, an electrician, and an accountant walk into a strip club.

The electrician calls a blonde over, licks a ten-dollar bill and slaps it on her ass. Then the plumber licks a fifty-dollar bill and he too slaps it on her ass.

The accountant takes out his ATM card, swipes it in the crack of her ass, reaches over and grabs the sixty bucks.