How is a woman like a hurricane?
When they come, they're loud and wet, and when they leave, they take your house and car.
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
How do you know when your cat's done cleaning himself?
He's smoking a cigarette.
2 reasons I know I'm getting old. My memory's not as sharp as it once was & my memory's not so good anymore.