How is a woman like a hurricane?
When they come, they're loud and wet, and when they leave, they take your house and car.
Why can't Barbie get pregnant?
Because Ken comes in a different box.
Two gay guys live together. The first guy says, "Let's play hide and seek. I'll hide, and if you can find me, I'll blow you."
The second guy asks, "What if I can't find you?"
His roomy tells him, "I'll be behind the piano."
I thought I would kid my wife a little, so I said: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, it's too long."
She shot back: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."
And that's when the fight started...