Why are crows so damn noisy when they fuck?
Caws!
Difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
An ironing board's legs are hard to open.
Hired a 19 year-old Danish girl with huge tits to babysit.
Now where the fuck am I going to get some kids?
A guy was complaining to his buddy that his new girlfriend was really kinky. His friend asked him: "How so?"
"Well" came the answer, "All she wants me to do is screw her in the ear." "In the ear? Wow. That is weird," his buddy remarked.
"Yeah," the guy continued. "Every time I go to stick my dick in her mouth, she turns her head."
