Can You Give A Date To This?

: Created: 30 October 2015; Hits: 2893

How do you confuse a female archaeologist?

Give her a used tampon and ask her what period it's from.

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Wicked Witch

One night I came home a little late and very drunk. There was my wife standing there holding a broom

Thinking fast (maybe too fast) I said: "Are you still cleaning or are you going for a ride?"

And that's when the fight started...

Damn Good

A man went to church one day and afterward he stopped to shake the preacher's hand. He said, "Preacher, I'll tell you, that was a damned fine sermon. Damned good!"

The preacher said, "Thank you sir, but I'd rather you didn't use profanity." The man said, "I was so damned impressed with that sermon I put five thousand dollars in the offering plate!"

The preacher quickly reponded, "No shit!"

Who's My Real Dad?

A son asks, "Dad, how come I have brown skin and you are white?"

"Well son, just take a look at your mother,".

"But Dad, she's not black either."

"I know, you idiot! She's a fucking whore!"