Who You Calling Little?

Dwarf to doctor: You're pretty busy. You treat dwarfs?

Doc: Yeah but you'll have to be a little patient.

A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, "You want to play 'Magic'?"

She says, "What's that?"

He says, "We go to my house and fuck, and then you disappear."

What's the difference between your paycheck and your dick?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.