Liberals vs. Conservatives

: Created: 07 June 2015; Hits: 2975

What's the difference between a conservative and a liberal?

A conservative is a liberal who's been mugged.

Don't Miss These Jokes!

The Daily is the Paper I Read

I know that newspapers are losing out to the Internet, but think about it... how many newspapers can a woman hold between her legs?

Easy! One Post, two Globes, and many Times. And I wouldn't mind a morning and an evening edition. Yeah... I like a woman who's into the hard news.

OK... I'm done.

On The Rag

What did one tampon say to the other?

Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.

A Sign of the Times

Two deaf men were in a coffee shop discussing their wives. One signs to the other: "Man, was my wife mad at me last night! She went on and on and wouldn't stop!"

His buddy signs back: "When my wife goes off on me I just don't listen." The fist guy signs: "How do you do that?"

His friend signs to him: "Easy! I turn the lights off!"