Smells Like A Good Time

What's the difference between pussy & pot?

If you can smell pot from across the room it's the good stuff.

After 20 years of marriage, I still get blow jobs.

If my wife finds out, she'll fucking kill me.

"Was your car ride with Grandma fun?"

"No Grampa. We didn't see any assholes, dumb bastards or shitheads."

What’s the difference between being hungry and horny?

Where you put the cucumber.