A female officer arrests a drunk. As she puts the cuffs on him she warns: "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you..."
Before she can finish the drunk shouts out: "Boobs"
A trucker who was on the road for two weeks stops at a whore house in Atlanta. He plops down $500 bucks and tells the madame: "I want your ugliest girl and a grilled cheese sandwich."
The madamce is astonished and says: "For that kind of money you can have any of my finest ladies and a 5-course dinner."
The trucker replies: "Listen darlin'... I'm not horny - I'm homesick!"