Why are cowgirls like cow pies?
The older they get the easier they are to pick up.
What would you call a guy who jerks off during an earthquake?
Focused.
Why do brides wear white?
The dishwasher should match the refrigerator and the stove.
A Chinese guy calls his boss and says: "Me sick... Can`t come to work today." The Boss says: "No problem. When I'm sick, I fuck my wife... try that!"
Two hours later the Chinese guy rings back and says: "Me better now... you got a nice house!"
