Why are cowgirls like cow pies?
The older they get the easier they are to pick up.
What would you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a box with his arms and legs?
Kit.
A guy, seeing two dogs going at it on the lawn says to his buddy, "You and your wife ever do it like that?"
"Only once" says his friend. "And it took 5 drinks to get her out in the yard."
I asked my wife to give me a blow job. She said "Can't you be more romantic?"
So I told her "Sure, give me a blow job... in the rain."
And that's when the fight started...
