Why are cowgirls like cow pies?
The older they get the easier they are to pick up.
What is a man's view of safe sex?
A padded headboard.
A drunk wakes up in a cemetery in a freshly-dug grave. He thinks: If I'm alive, why's there a tombstone? If I'm dead, why do I have to piss?
What do you get when you cross a computer with a prostitute?
A fucking know-it-all.
