What A Ride!

Two little old ladies were at the slots in Atlantic City. One asks: "So... did you come on the bus?"

Her friend replied: "Yeah, but I made it look like an asthma attack."

Wife: "Will you love me when I'm old and fat?"

Husband: "I do."

And that's when the fight started...

My wife suggested we go to a marriage counselor to work on our relationship. I said sure. We get there and the therapist asks me to tell how I felt.

I said: "I knew right from the beginning our marriage wouldn't work. I'm an Aquarius and she's a cunt."

And that's when the fight started...

Just booked a table for me and the wife for Valentine's Day.

Hope the bitch knows how to play snooker.