What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass?
A Mechanic.
A car salesman sits down at a bar next to a hooker.
He orders a drink and says: "If I don't sell some cars I'm going to lose my ass."
The hooker looks at him and says: "Yeah... well if I don't sell some ass I'm gonna lose my car."
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
"How do you breath through something that small?"
Guy walks into a bar. Bartender asks: "What'll you have buddy?" The guys says: "Surprise me."
So the bartender pulls out a naked picture of the guy's wife!
