What's the difference between love, true love, and just showing off?
Spit, swallow, and gargle
What does a virgin and a balloon have in common?
One prick and it's all over.
One night my wife tried to get a rise out of me and make me jealous. She asked: "Honey, what would you say if I was having sex with your best friend?"
I told her: "I'd say you're a lesbian!"
And that's when the fight started...
Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"
Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"
