My wife is constantly complaining that I don't listen to her...
...or something like that.
I overheard my girlfriend on the phone say to her friend she wants to get engaged on Valentine's Day.
Hope she finds someone nice.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
What do you call a teenager who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
