My wife is constantly complaining that I don't listen to her...
...or something like that.
Where does a one-legged waitress work?
IHOP
What's her name?
Ilene
How is a woman like a hurricane?
When they come, they're loud and wet, and when they leave, they take your house and car.
A guy was complaining to his buddy that his new girlfriend was really kinky. His friend asked him: "How so?"
"Well" came the answer, "All she wants me to do is screw her in the ear." "In the ear? Wow. That is weird," his buddy remarked.
"Yeah," the guy continued. "Every time I go to stick my dick in her mouth, she turns her head."
