What do you get when you sleep with a judge?
An honorable discharge.
I was visiting New York City recently and had to ask for directions. I went over to a random guy on the street and asked for his help.
Right away he told me, "Sure, head down 42nd street and take a left at the corner of get a map and fuck you!"
Gee, New Yorkers are so friendly...
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
Slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.
I have a a real problem with sex and booze...
Every time I have sex, my girlfriend boos.
