Why do blondes wear underwear?
To keep their ankles warm.
In college I wanted to join the debating team.
But somebody talked me out of it.
Guy catches his son jerking off: "Son don't do that, you'll go blind."
Son shouts back "Pop, I'm over here."
I know I've been married too long. Last week I went to the doctor. He asked: "Have you had sex in the last seven days?" And I said: "No, my birthday's in April."
