The laundromat: a bad place to find chicks.
If she can't afford a washing machine how can she support you?
Gallery owner: "Guy came in bought all your paintings."
Artist: "Great."
"Not really, he was your doctor."
What's in the toilet of the star ship enterprise?
The captain's log.
How many Freudian psychaitrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to change the bulb and the other to hold the penis. Ladder! I meant ladder.