Why'd the trapeze artist divorce his wife?
He caught her in the act.
A girl's going across town in a cab. When she gets where she's going she discovers she has no money.
She lifts her skirt and says, "Cabbie, you want to barter?"
He takes a look and says, "Lady, haven't you got anything smaller?"
When's the best time to put out the cat?
When it's on fire.
What's it called when a WWE wrestler ties his opponent's dick in a knot?
A Willie Nelson.