A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked right up to the pharmacist, looked him straight in the eye, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."
The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription."
A blonde girl comes home from school one day and tells her mom: "We were learning our numbers today and everyone else could only count to 5, but I could count to 10. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!"
Her mom tells her "Great job honey!" The girl asks her mom "Is it because I'm blonde?" Her mom tells her: "Yes it is."
The next day the blonde girl comes home from school and tells her mom: "We were learning our alphabets today and everyone else could only get to E, but I got to J. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J!"
Her mom tells her "Great job honey!" The girl asks her mom "Is it because I'm blonde?" Her mom tells her again: "Yes it is."
On the third day the blonde girl comes home from school and tells her mom: "Today we were in the showers after gym class and all of the other girls were flat chested, but I have these!" Whereupon the girl lifts her shirt revealing very large breasts.
Her mom tells her "Um... Great job honey." The girl asks her mom: "Is it because I'm blonde?"
Her mom replies "No dear, it's because you're 25."
