Johnson is standing on the train platform when the guy next to him waves and yells" "Goodbye! Your wife's a great fuck!"
Johnson is shocked and asks the guy: "Who were you yelling to?" The guy tells Johsnon: "That's my brother." "Wow" Johnson tells him, "That's incedibly insensitive!"
The guy says: "Actually I'm very sensitive. My brother's wife is a lousy fuck. I didn't want to hurt his feelings."
I always wanted a pair of real cowboy boots. So I found a pair on sale and wore them home. Walking in the kitchen I asked my wife: "Notice anything different about me?" She looked up and said: "Nope."
So I figured how to fix that. I went into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots. Again I asked her: "Notice anything different now?" This time she slowly looked me up and down, then said: "What's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday and it'll be hanging down again tomorrow!"
Now I was really mad so I told her: "You know why it's hanging down. 'Cause it's lookin' at my new boots!" Without missing a beat she said" "Then you shoulda bought a hat."
A blonde walks up to a salesman and says, "I want to buy this TV."
He says, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
She goes for a complete make-over...she gets a haircut and new hair color, a new outfit, and puts on big sunglasses. She waits a few days and then she walks up to the salesman and says, "I want to buy this TV."
