Most Men Talk A Lot Of Sh*t!

Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?

It helps them remember which end to wipe...

This is going to be the 1st Valentine's Day I was single in almost 10 years. I'm kind of excited...

I just hope the wife feels the same way when she finds out.

What do you call a deaf bully?

Anything you want.

After weeks without gettin' any I got really pissed off and asked my wife: "What has two arms, two legs, two boobs & sucks?"

Before she could even think of a reply I told her: "You and a vacuum cleaner."

And that's when the fight started...