What should you do if your clothes are on fire?
Don't put 'em on.
A new bride was embarrassed to be on her honeymoon. When she and her husband pulled up to the hotel, she asked him if there was any way that they could make it appear as if they had been married a long time.
He responded, "Sure. You carry the luggage!"
And that's when the fight started...
Why are a woman's breasts like a Xmas train set?
Originally made for kids but dad wants to play with them.
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
