What's the difference between pussy and apple pie?
You can eat your Mom's apple pie.
A guy is at the funeral home viewing his wife's coffin with a sad look on his face. His friend walks up to comfort him and says: "Don't worry Harry, you'll meet another woman."
"I know," Harry replied, "but what am I going to do tonight?"
What do you have with two balls in your hand?
A man's undivided attention.
Why are blondes so easy to get into bed?
Who cares!
