You know why men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
Because they are tired of using their own.
What do lesbians cook for dinner?
They don't cook... they eat out.
A guy wakes up in the hospital: "Doc, I can't feel my legs!"
Doc: "That's because we amputated your arms."
What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?
Seizure Salad.
