A guy is driving home when a cop pulls him over. The cop says, "Have you been drinking?" The guy says, "Yes, I have." The cop says, "Please step out of the car." The guy says, "Why? Don't you believe me?"
A married couple thought they were way too interested in sex, so they decided to make love only in the months that had an "R" in them. This worked OK until they hit May, June, and July.
Finally, the husband came home from work onr night and asked his wife, "What month is it?"