You know why men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
Because they are tired of using their own.
What does a bull do to stay warm on a cold day?
He heads over to the barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.
(Ah please... just google it!)
His date warned him: "My mama made me promise I'd say 'NO' to all your advances."
He says: "Sure, no problem. You wouldn't mind if I fucked you in the ass, would ya?"
Just booked a table for me and the wife for Valentine's Day.
Hope the bitch knows how to play snooker.