A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Switzerland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used.
She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. "These," she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce."
She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?"
A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"
A husband gets home from his day in court on a traffic offense and his wife asks: "So, how did it go?"
The husband replies: "Well honey, I ended up in front of Judge Calloway, you remember, the judge who married us. Turns out he remembered me too... so I pleaded 'guilty with explanation' and he only gave me a small fine. That was way better than the last time, when you and I were in there together. That time he gave me life without the possibility of parole."
