What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?
Because the snowblower was coming down the block.
So I went to the doctor for a physical and he told me I should stop jerking off. I asked him why should I stop?
He told me: "Because you're at a physical."
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
